If you’d like some reassuring words from a
sexy soothing voice, might I suggest this audio from Jack of Splathouse Fic. He also does erotic audios and, well, horny-scared is better than just scared right?
I’m writing this at 5am and I’ve been drifting in and out of waking since about 2, when I stumbled into my bathroom to hack up bile and let my stomach sort out whatever had irritated it this time around. I’d gone to bed with a…not a tightness in my chest, but the feeling of something dense there, something that makes me want to try coughing it out, even though I don’t technically feel the need to cough. Not yet anyway. But I did make a supply run first thing Monday morning, sooooooo…..concerns.
It’s been stressful, dear Creatures, I won’t lie. I’m on immuno-suppressants because lupus is an autoimmune shitshow, so I’m on the COVID-19 high-risk list. Plus I live in a building full of seniors, many of whom are already in poor health due to a history of homelessness. My Mom, also a senior albeit way healthier than me refuses to stay home and has been stubbornly, gleefully running around the city. Sure she dropped off some food and a lovely bouquet of flowers when she visited, but of course, she’s still 70, so I worry. I’ve been trying to distract myself, but I’ve been getting just all the emotions this past week.
Things are rough, people are scared and yeah, I’m scared too. Fuck, I don’t even know what I’m actually scared about? The fact that my tiny dorm fridge and 150 sq ft apartment make stockpiling impossible? That my mother might get sick because she’s like a bratty kid who can’t sit her ass in her gorgeous, expensive apartment for more than an hour? That my neighbor who already has tons of respiratory problems might get it? That I might? That if (when) I have to go out again for supplies, I might get mugged by some asshole who thinks that 37 rolls of toilet paper aren’t enough?
Seriously? WTF is up with the toilet paper thing, people? Just…the fuck?
I barely know what to even say. It’s hard to keep a cool head, especially if you’re higher-risk and surrounded by morons. I can’t tell you how to cope. The comment box is open if you want to vent and I’ll put a list of “hope this helps” links below. Feel free to add more resources/ sanity savers via the comment box as well.
Hang in there, Creatures. You’ll weather this.
Massive Link Dump
NYC-specific COVID-19 info (311) [Text COVID to 692-692 to get city-wide updates on services, COVIDESP to 692-692 for Spanish]
Free zines for download – Echo Publishing
List of documentaries to watch, compliments of my buddy Eliza